Control of others wastes one's energy
By Kavita Maharaj - Nanaimo News Bulletin - December 08, 2008
One of the most important things yoga teaches is anything and anyone outside of ourselves is beyond our control.
And while many may willingly agree with this statement, determining where one’s path begins and ends is sometimes a challenging thing.
The quotation from John Donne, “No man is an island, entire of itself” is a well known one. It speaks to the unavoidable interplay of each of our existences.
The reality of life is our path inevitably interacts with the path of others, and the actions we take do affect them just as the actions they take affect us.
With this reality in the forefront of our minds, the temptation often exists to try to control others’ actions when their path comes into contact with ours. This is an act of ego on our part, and when we attempt this, it shows that we have lost sight of the reality stated above: anything and anyone outside of ourselves, is beyond our control.
Trying to control what is outside of ourselves is futile, and an exercise in blind frustration. Even though we may experience moments when we believe we have succeeded in controlling another, we will inevitably find we are mistaken and have wasted unnecessary energy in the process.
The more we waste our energies trying to control what is outside of ourselves, the less energy and focus we have available for what is actually within our control ... our own thoughts, attitudes and actions.
If we are mindful, we will see the clear distinction between our path and another’s. We will be able to differentiate where we ought to spend our energies and where it is a waste of mental, physical and emotional resources.
Yoga teaches us our desire to control the world around us is born out of avidya – the ignorance of not knowing our true selves.
The more we practice the yogic way, the more we get to know ourselves; the more we get to know ourselves, the more we release our desire to control others. And the less we attempt to control others, the more control we gain over ourselves and as a result, over our own path.
